Yesterday's Sunny Day/Today's Rainy Outcome

If my body was on fire, ooh You’ d watch me burn down in flames You said you loved me you're a liar Cause you never, ever, ever did baby...
But darling I’ll still catch a grenade for ya
Throw my hand on a blade for ya (yeah, yeah, yeah)
I’d jump in front of a train for ya (yeah, yeah , yeah)
You know I'd do anything for ya (yeah, yeah, yeah) Oh, oh
I would go through all this pain, Take a bullet straight through my brain,
Yes, I would die for ya baby ; But you won't do the same.
No, you won’t do the same,
You wouldn’t do the same,
Ooh, you’ll never do the same,
No, no, no, no
-Grenade By Bruno Mars.
Who would of thought a song by Bruno Mars would have reflected how my life was four years ago??? If  I knew then what I know now things would be different. I realized that I loved you too much and I didn't love myself enough. I felt like since I never had my father that you could fill that void in my heart. But to be truly honest with myself it didn't work. I was young then and I felt as though the world owed me something. I had to look inside myself and realized that I didn't exactly know my own self worth and its sad to say that I wasn't too confident within myself, but the Lord sent me someone who could somehow show me that I am worth something and that happy endings do exist. When you love someone it supposed to be equal and somehow I didn't feel that love was reciprocated. I figured that throughout time I could make him love me and I just got fed up and I said to myself that I don't need him and he was hurting me more than loving me. At first it was hard to deal with and I would cry about it and I couldn't understand why the fuck this was happening to me...I lost myself through it all. I did some soul searching and through it all I lost an associate. I say associate because we were never really friends. Real friends are there  for one another and have a connection. But somehow I realized that real friends don't set you up for failure and leave you out to dry. So I say goodbye to bad memories and hello to the wonderful things life has to offer.

Even though we come from two different worlds you've always been there for me and I appreciate you. No one seems to understand me like you do.  I can be having a fucked up day and you and I can converse about it and I feel better. At times I feel as though I don't do enough to help you but I just feel its in my nature. With time I hope our friendship continues grows stronger as well as learn the ropes of life through fashion love and the boys...Love You Ace and thanks for being a TRUE FRIEND!!!!