For the first time in my life today I faced what I called public humiliation ....I feel as though people judge me before they know me and the fact that people are prejudice against their own race just makes me think that this world is going to shambles....I know that the only way to truly fix this problem is to find a new solution. I'm 23 years old and if I don't leave now, I won't ever get out. I can't wait til the day comes when I can say good bye to that fucking hellhole that is called work ....I've never in my life been around such grimey people. Im greatful for the life that my mother gave me but I wish that I wasn't sheltered so much...I have a problem opening up to outsiders because of the environment that I'm in on a daily basis. I never realized that this takes a toll on my mind. Sometimes if  I could I would peel back the skin on my arms and endure any other type of pain other than that. I'm not a person that likes conflict, but I'm not passive either. I'm not a shit starter but I'ma definitely finish the shit. I sometimes think that people are jealous of me because I have so much going for myself. I'm not a jealous person and I don't wish bad on anyone but it seems as though people always wish shit on me. I'm a nice person and I don't feel as though I deserve to be treated like I'm not capable of success. For the closing of this, I know that in order to find happiness, I have to accept change, and I'm ready for it!!!!

A SMALL Girl in a BIG World

I am good, but not an angel. I do sin, but I am not the devil. I am just a small girl in a big world trying to find someone to love."
— Marilyn Monroe

When I lay down at night, I find myself dreaming about my future. What my husband will look like? What will my children look like? But most importantly Will I be happy? I can't predict the future but I'm fine with letting love go and allowing it to find me. They say LOVE is never easy but once you've got it many people strive to keep it and lastly many never truly find it. I don't want to be one of those people. I love my life for what it is amd sometimes its a little lonely but between friends and the stones that are thrown at you there can never really be a dull moment. I have to sometimes keep smiling when I feel down and I have to help someone even it means I have to sacrifice for awhile. I know that GOD works in mysterious ways and that he can show me the good things as long I try to do better for myself, help others, and love him for what he has done for me. I have to allow him into my life more than I have been. For the first time in two years I stepped inside of a church this past sunday and somehow something clicked inside of me that had never done so before. I remember sitting in the service and some how the light bulb came on. It felt like I needed to go to church. Once I left I was at peace for the day and it actually felt good to do something right for a change. So I with this saying..."It is a terrible thing to see and have no vision. "
—Helen Keller

New Beginnings

It's been over a month since I've last spoken...New changes came into my life so I had to start somewhere. First thing is I now have my OWN apartment and boy does it feel great to be independent. I think that I was a little afraid to be on my own but now its something that I own. I'm in school before my five year mark hit and it took a lot for me to get to this point. I think I had to spend some time growing and trying to find myself. Rhomesha Rochelle has found herself for the most part, I just have to shape up a few edges and I'll be able to share myself with the world. What a force to be reckoned with kinda thing huh??? Someone special is in the works. I just have to get things together from my perspective, I'm not perfect but I strive to be better than I was yesterday and the day before that. Sometimes life can pass you by, and I refused to get left behind.

I wanna run (run)
Smash into you
I wanna run (run)
And smash into you
-Beyonce She said it best I wanna run smash into love life and exceed all my expectations that life offers me.